Is Chivalry Dead?

Dating today is a mixture of Women's Lib and Chivalry:

When you do date a man you need to let him know whether or not it is okay to open your door or not. Men nowadays or at a loss as to whether or not to do so since many women in society are for women's lib. Some women prefer to go dutch treat on the first few dates then allow a man to pay for the meal. If this is the situation you will need to keep your date informed of this and also inform him when it is okay to pay for the full meal, in advance of the date of course so he is prepared financially. Therefore, it is not fully the man's fault that women are questioning whether or not chivalry is dead. The question is fully a valid one. But still my answer remains no.

When I began dating, my now current husband, a little over three years ago he was definitely your class A man on chivalry. You didn't have to ask him to open your door. Actually, he got a bit rattled when I opened the car door myself without waiting on him to do so for me. He told me "let me do that please from now on" as politely as possible. He is definitely a man who was raised to be a gentleman and the provider of the household. He could not believe that when I was married previously that I had been the biggest bread winner and that I paid the largest majority of the household expenses while my husband squandered his check on his hobbies and pleasures.

Actually chivalry is alive today if it is taught to our sons as the grow up and are molded into young men. Also, our young women need to learn though to accept it and allow those young men to be themselves and be chivalrous and not be shunned or made fun of for doing so. It needs to be accepted as a good trait and just because women have found the freedom to express and be themselves, we also need to accept and allow the man to still be himself. Concessions can be made. In my instance I finally convince my boyfriend that it was okay if I bought a meal out once in a while. I even convinced him after moving in with him that it was okay for me to pay a few of the household expenses such as cable, light or Internet now and then. I never paid all of them each month because it would make him feel odd and obliged. I understood and respected the way he was brought up. So I never forced things much. Now we are married and I help out even more. If I bring up let's grab a bite then I pull out the money for it he doesn't complain. If I grab a few of the bills to pay on payday and pay them and leave the receipts on the table there's no problem. However, he still opens my door, holds my hand, kisses my hand and strokes my cheek and is sure to give me a kiss before he leaves out the door for work or anywhere without me. He is sure to stand up and protect my name if anyone tries anything with me and he does stop and see if a woman could use assistance when she looks like it.

No, chivalry is not dead. Women's lib is alive too. We just need to know how to occasionally make concessions our partners in life. That way we can each be comfortable with our own unique selves and live together harmoniously.